It may or may not be due to the fact I watched the movie Anti Christ last night. Have you heard of this movie? Its one of those artsy, metaphorical movies that may or may not be REALLY AWFUL, but hipsters and movie-fanatics rate it high on imdb.com to prove that they're cultured enough to get it.
Have you clicked the link to the synopsis yet?
I hope you read it.
I hope you read it and then feel bad for me for watching it.
Point being: I have felt achey and keep getting weird butterflies in my stomach (IS IT BECAUSE I AM IN LOVE?)
(no.)
I'm creditting the butterflies to awful subconscious flashbacks to the scenes from Anti Christ.
ANYWAY, last night I tell my mom I feel pretty gross and that I'm probably coming down with a cold again.
She tells me that I should not go to work tomorrow. I generally take maybe 2 sick days a year when I'm working, and that's when my boss sends me home. Call it work ethic, or being a COURAGEOUS WOLF, but I hate staying home sick.
My mother says "Don't feel bad about calling in sick, Larissa."
"Well I can't, mom."
I guess she thinks I'm being stubborn, as she says "Well why not?"
"Because no one will be there to answer the phone. :( "
WHAT TO DO when you're the only employee that picks up calls?
Coincidentally I came into work today, and ensured that Darin, the paralegal, read the entire synopsis to Anti Christ, despite his protests that he really, really, wasn't interested in reading it at all.
I suppose starting the conversation off with "OH MY GOD, I watched the most FUCKED UP MOVIE EVER last night" didn't help.
NUMBER TWO:
I have a penchant for wanting to cross-dress on halloween.
Why? I do not know. I guess it all went downhill after I dressed as Tom Cruise from Risky Business.
I love halloween more than any other holiday, and plan for it easily 6 months in advance. I generally drop a good 100 dollars on any given costume, so its serious business.
I've been mulling over ideas for a while now, including:
1. Where's Waldo
2. Jack Sparrow
3. The Kokanee Ranger
4. A Sex Offender (Which, now that I think about it, is just the Kokanee Ranger in different clothes)
5. MC Hammer
OR
OR
OR
A STORM TROOPER!
This would make my life.
I can probably get a mask online for about 50 dollars and fashion most of what I need out of fun foam.
YAYYYYYYY FUN FOAM.
I'm god damn pumped for this. Considering I rocked my rights as a woman and dressed as a "Sexy Nurse" last halloween, I think I am owed a gender neutral costume.
... with hot pants on, obviously.
MY KINDA WOLF!
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